I'm 20, and I have done so many wrong, cringy, embarrassing, and awkward things, how can I not worry about them or get over them?

Question

They always haunt me, and many people have negatively judged me and my personality for them. How can I make things right?

Answer 1

Accept the fact that you were an idiot, and try not to make the same mistakes again.

Answer 2

Many people share these "issues' and for most people they are a part of life. You get over them by focusing on the here and now, and doing things in a more focused and productive way.

Answer 3

It is called growing up and you learn as you go.



God if I fretted about everything wrong, cringy, embarrassing and awkward that I have done in my life I would be in a mental institution.



You can't change anything you have done.



You might feel crap about them but I doubt anyone else remembers or cares about them.

Answer 4

Stop thinking about those things. When thoughts come into mind about regrettable events, quickly change your thought to something else...anything else. Just stop giving any further thought to the subjet. After doing this for long enough those upsetting thoughts stop coming to you.

Answer 5

Everyone makes mistakes xxx

Answer 6

Human brains do not fully developed until around age 23. Keep this in mind as you are not completely at fault for your earlier actions. Say a prayer, ask for forgiveness, and good luck to you.

Answer 7

We've all done things we regret. Can't go back and change it. Best to make amends where and when you can and grow from it.

Pass on your knowledge and experience to others so they can benefit from it.

Answer 8

Become 25 and then you'll have forgotten half the old cringe and have new cringe

Answer 9

Well, at 20, I wouldn't beat myself up so badly. We all make mistakes and childhood and adolescence are full of them. It is almost tempting to sign a disclaimer form saying "Please do not hold me totally responsible for actions before the age of 21". The good news is that you recognize they were mistakes. If the damage done was significant, and if you can do so without creating more problems, see if you can correct it or at least apologize to anyone hurt by your actions. Otherwise, resolve to be more considerate of others, think of possible consequences (positive and negative) before you act, and move on. If it only involved playing the fool--and embarrassing yourself, well everybody plays the fool as the old song goes. Apologize where needed/possible and move on. Best to you.

Answer 10

Do the next right thing and keep doing that. In everyone's mind there two main thought systems, the ego thought system and the Higher Self thought system. Make a concerted effort to follow the Higher Self thought System. Sin, guilt, and fear are in the ego thought system. Peace, love and forgiveness are in the Higher Self thought system.

Answer 11

Most 20 year olds are the same.

Answer 12

This is a very good thing that you are hurting actually. You may repent and ask people for forgiveness, and this may ease your pain. A lot of people either forget about it, force themselves not dwell on it, or just learn to live with it.



But, in my view, there is a bigger issue here. You have finally realized that such situations, when you (your conscience) are out of tune with your actions, arise frequently. This is really a spiritual experience. You've seen the both of you: the Soul and the Ego. Ego is not so bad and you don't have to be so paranoid with what it does. It is conditioned by various things and if you've never been taught to control it, then You (the Higher Self of you) is out of control, and you are out of control too. The problem is that we are never in control, we can only control our attention, i.e. how intently we are listening, and our choice we have a chance to make. We are just a leaf going where the river of life will take us to get new realizations.



Console yourself by thinking that it was a necessary learning experience. If you had been smarter or prepared by the family and/or the society, or your religious sect, you probably wouldn't have done what you did. The problem is that when you associate yourself with that little miserable self that is always conscious of being perishable then you fall into temptation of doing stupid things more easily. If, however, you train yourself to be constantly aware of the presence of something deeper inside of you and learn to act according to that Super Call which is barely audible, then all those embarrassing situations were worth it and the frustrating moments of feeling guilty were not in vain.

P.S. Apologize for your misdeeds in front of the people or in your heart, and forgive yourself.

Answer 13

I have done many things in my 20s I've been ashamed of,mostly things that could of been prevented and most were my own fault. Other times awkward things have happened to me that I could of handled better and sometimes I feel I could go back to anyone involved and sort situations out. I know the feeling, things pop into my mind a lot and I don't tend to forget things in the past unless details have just been forgotten about.



I suggest giving it time, if you can't forget about a situation try to find the funny side of it, try not to become bitter and just realise we can't change the past or what other people say do and think.

Answer 14

You learn from them!! They’re very precious if you think of them as opportunities to grow. So yes, dwell on those memories. Don’t beat yourself up, just analyze why they’re not your proudest moments. When a similar situation happens, you’ll make a better choice — one you can reflect on happily!

Answer 15

Just move on, everyone makes mistakes.

Answer 16

Just dont care about it, really. People talk sh*t about you, so what? It really doesnt do anything to you. Just think about it, why should you care what others think about you?

Answer 17

How about minding your own business?

Answer 18

Forgive yourself first. Then try the best you can to amend things. Use your past as a learning experience to better yourself. You're only human it's okay if you made mistakes but please don't be so hard on yourself. May good fortune be with you friend

Answer 19

Learn from it and look to the future.

Answer 20

This is normal. In life people will regret somethings that they did (Cringy, embarrassing and awkward,)

I would say the best thing you can do to get over them is laugh about them and move on, and make a new self that you feel comfortable with. lol, im no pro or expert, just someone who has gone through some similar things lol.

Answer 21

lol, you sound just like me and how I have felt for most of my life ( and still do sometimes) you just have to realize that it's all in the past and if you dwell on it it will always hold you back, realize that everyone makes mistakes, and many others have doe embarrassing things too, learn to let them go and just try not to do them again in the future.

Answer 22

The question is why are so worried about me. Everyone has a life , must not be satisfied with yours to come on internet to ask questions about someone else. find your life and worry about your own and not other peoples that have nothing to do with you.Its always only the insecure and unhappy people who try to feel superior.Feel better.

Answer 23

and even though that's the way it is....

what's done can't be undone... hopefully it can be fixed....

and even though that's the way it is....

you're - still- at the utmost age of flourishing in every way-on one hand- and a difficult age , too, on the other hand....

Answer 24

People always say that you can't go back and correct your mistakes, but in a sense, you can. Whenever you do the right thing, in a sense you're correcting a mistake. Let's say you broke somebody's window when you were a kid but yesterday you fixed somebody's window for free. It's a philosophical question - a window is a window, isn't it, no matter who it belongs to? If you accept that reasoning, all you have to do is keep doing right.



There are other things that have to do with psychotherapy, like mindfulness, living in the present moment. If you're interested you can read about these in my answers, or talk about them with a professional.

Answer 25

You did them already.

Apologize and move on.

It's past and can not be changed.

Answer 26

So have I, VERY cringey things...but like someone else said, everyday is a new blank slate :) Plus I don't identify with my past mistakes, they are not forever me.

Answer 27

Pretend that a close friend of yours did these things and confided in you about them, what would you recommend for them to do?

Answer 28

It feels like you may be pretty fun/funny/creative.. I can remember doing the same in my 20’s wondering why I didn’t fit in and obsessing over how embarrassed I was that I did things. Most of the time to try and fit in or, if there was no chance if that I would go for it in the other direction. Either way, the lesson learned is that you can’t fit a square peg into a round hole and thank god for that! You are stuck in a pattern and it’s common and normal to repeat the sand worry over and over again but I can share that the people you worry judge you are not important in the big picture. Create something, write a poem or joke, record yourself and see who you are (just do you can see you) Get to know yourself. You will be surprised at how great you are.

Answer 29

Life is all a learning process. First thing I would do is to forgive myself. Understand that what you did in the past was wrong/cringy/embarrassing/awkward and put it behind you. If these actions involve other people, ask for their forgiveness as well. You want to get over things? Then, get over it - by doing so. Worrying about the past just keeps the past present.

Afterwards, decide what you want your future to be like, then make your future present. You can not start your future while you are still lingering in the past.

Answer 30

You do not have to make all things right. We are human and we make mistakes, so the best thing is to know what you have done and try not to repeat bad acts. Just be a better person today, and try to keep that up.

Answer 31

Forget it